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News From the Alumni House
His Yale or Mine? Re-experiencing Yale as a Parent
November
2000
by Marne Obemauer '65
In April
1996, as a representative for the Class of 1965, I arrived in New
Haven for an AYA Assembly.
I was particularly interested in the Assembly topic, "Admissions:
Selection for Leadership," because my oldest son Matthew had just
been accepted for the Class of 2000.
At the outset of the college selection
process, Matt felt he might like his own school, as opposed to "following in Dad's
footsteps." However, by the end he decided that Yale was the best place for him
and he didn't feel he should "penalize himself" because I went to Yale.
In the afternoon I reported to
a workshop on admissions decisions. As I approached the leader, an associate director
of admissions, she glanced at my nametag and, face brightening, asked, "Are you
Matt Obernauer's father?" It was at that moment I realized that my primary identity
at Yale now was Matt Obernauer's father, that he was not about to enter my school
but his own, and I was to begin following in his footsteps.
Does that sound melodramatic?
Well, I understated. Matt soon joined the Yale Daily News, so of course I signed up for a subscription. Now I could keep up
with all the issues on campus and many of the concerns of current
students. Later, I learned how to access the YDN on the Internet
(yaledailynews.com).
After a while, checking the News in the morning became as
habitual as checking my e-mail.
But the aspect of this
reconnection with Yale that was most enlightening, and joyful, was
making the acquaintance of a broad cross-section of students -- Davenport
College, the News, various sports teams, singing groups,
and a fraternity. These are some
of the most interesting, dynamic, energetic, and caring men and
women I have ever encountered. I mentioned earlier that the AYA
Assembly on admissions was entitled "Selection for Leadership,"
and if that is the guiding mission of the admissions office, they
appear to have succeeded superbly.
My generation of 1960's students
was noted for its active idealism, and some have lamented its absence in this
generation. Idealism -- that sense of wanting to make the world a better place -- is very much alive and particularly well-expressed by a Yale undergraduate
body in which at least half of all students are engaged in some form of community
activity.
But
many of today's students manifest their idealism somewhat differently
than we did 35 years ago. Whereas we tended to express our
activism through existing structures, often governmental, students
today look to by-pass existing structures and build their own. They
seem more confident in relying on themselves (and may be less confident
in government). The result is a more entrepreneurial social activism
-- an appropriate and constructive reflection of this era.
Between AYA meetings,
parents' events, football games, and any other excuse I can find
to be on campus, I became a witness to, and even a very minor participant
in, an exceptional example of this social entrepreneurism. Several
students, including my son, founded an organization that responds
to the new welfare-to-work culture and is dedicated to building
networks in the business community to connect people to jobs. Today,
this two-year old organization, called National
Student Partnerships, has moved its headquarters from New Haven
to Washington, supports a permanent staff, and has expanded to more
than 20 chapters at universities across America.
Now the Class of 2000
has graduated, and Matt will be moving on to new experiences. But
fortunately for me, my younger son Michael is in the Class of 2002
and is exposing me to yet another fascinating and dynamic cross-section
of students and activities. Mike has become very active with the
Yale radio station (WYBC)
and is heard regularly broadcasting Yale hockey games, as well as
several other sports. Now the hockey mavens of my class look to
me for the inside scoop on the Bulldogs hockey team.
Given the extraordinary competitiveness
of the Yale admissions process, even for alumni children, I am twice blessed.
My sons enjoy this magnificent experience while I am at the same time afforded
a unique window into Yale. They have allowed me to reconnect with Yale in ways
that would otherwise not be possible.
Yale was a wonderful
place when I attended -- stimulating, challenging, and enriching.
I can bear witness that Yale is an even better place today.
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